Some days you just want to crawl into bed and forget everything. I had one of those days. It started with talking to a very dear friend of mine who was hurting and it seemed I could do nothing but listen to her. I wanted to just hold her and say everything would be better but that is not always possible in life. I was sad to see that her spirit was almost broken but I will be there for her and let her now she is love.
I wonder why reality life on the computer can take a life on its own. I am seeing more people get hurt on here and I know I spend too much time on it and not take it so seriously. I have some true friends that I have become close too and friendships that I will have for a lifetime hopefully. I also have to start looking at what my real life will be like and I cant grow being on a computer all day. Today I defended a friend on IMVU and it got a bit nasty and after I had to wonder why it ever got to that.
I am frustrated at what is happening with my work and how I feel I have been treated after almost 39 years giving everything I had to the company. I am scared shitless about what the future will bring to me. I am going next Tuesday too see what the results are the cancer on my face. I know is it not terminal but it still really worries me.
I have reflected about my situation and even though I am having problems there are people worse off than me and there are persevering and making the best of a bad situations. It is just a bad day and I will try and wake up and make the best of it tomorrow
It is interesting that most are transgender and each is worse off because they wanted to be who they really are. I read an article that talked about the misconceptions of what it is being transgender. They missed one that society is accepting of people who transition. I think we do have friends that accept us but society is as a whole doesn't. They just keep their prejudices just hidden but we are really not accepted. Why do you think there are some many suicides with transgender individual. That people who should transition wont because of the consequences. Just think if I told work that if I had terminal cancer they would be caring but would not make a huge deal I told them I have a neurological problem and it is a huge deal and they have to having meeting with all my staff and I am treated different. I am just frustrated but will move forward in my life but a little less confident that I will ever be totally accepted for who I really am
I am thrilled and delighted to see you writing here again. It has been far, far too long.
ReplyDeleteYou are still a lot stronger than you realize and each issue will sort itself out one at a time. Some things will be rough and others will go easy. That's just life and all of us have those awful moments where we wonder if it's even worth trying to get up off the floor when the worst has pushed us down.
In the end, the only thing in this whole crazy world that any of us have any control over is how we choose to act and react to the things that happen to and around us. It is easy for any person to hide behind an injustice, be it real or perceived, as an excuse to not get the most out of life. But the only loser, when that option is taken, if yourself.
I really hope to be seeing more of you here and, likewise, am keeping my fingers crossed to see if you'll pick up your camera again. It would be a real shame if you didn't.
Brava, Rachel, for getting up the courage to start moving forward again.